They say you can be anybody you choose to be in a city so huge. Step onto a local, stand by the door, see the city whizz past you. The rushing air almost dislocates your limb. But you like the numbness. For ten stations in between on a fast local, you can even fly. In the milieu of faces, you can be anybody. Or nobody at all.
We get out of small towns, let our aspirations piper us all the way to the big cities, in the quest of namelessness. Brave a stampede to fight the daily fight to get back to our suburban homes. The dream has been sold. You’re a fighter.
But you came here to be that nameless somebody. I hope it is liberating. You were so lost when you first came here to live the dream with your lover. The lover’s stopped loving since then. The city has cast it’s nameless spell on both of you, in such a profound and distinct way.
Do you feel like a ghost in the sea of humans? Like the world would painfully be the same even if you weren’t here? The liberation comes with its own sense of loneliness.
You find your way to that long lost lover you dreamed to be nameless with, in this city churning out dreams. For every feverish hour that was spent without her, you can’t even remember the last time you were together in the city you lost yourselves in.
You find each other one last time before you decide that your first serenade with the city has found a minim rest.
The oscillating between finding and losing your way can be exhausting. However, the city quietly tells you that there is a new excitement in this losing and finding your way every single time.
As for humans; friends; lovers, you learn to let go as you learn to lose the idea of glorifying being a ghost in the room.